Janus Speaks

When I enjoyed dying...

2008-10-24T09:17:00.000-07:00

Every occasion, on me, don’t put blame,

This time seemed interested even the pretty dame.

In those moments a lot was said,

Some thoughts though were, as illusions, fed.

Made few yet big castles in thin air,

Even when opposed by my inner naysayer.

I know that even she had something for me,

Not for no reasons was I in state of glee.

But the euphoria was over pretty soon,

My feelings changed like phases of moon.

Though this time I had no regrets,

Despite the parting am glad we met.

To be cherished are some memories it seems,

God be with thou miss and all your dreams.

Not Again!!

2008-07-29T00:38:00.000-07:00

From the ashes it has risen again,
Phoenix! And I am to experience that pain.
It so also happened some time back,
And I could not peacefully hit the sack.
Took some time to overcome tumult inside,
Her and myself I could only deride.
I and myself were now living in peace,
But Venus it seems can't see me at ease.
Sweet, confident, intelligent and shy,
Some adjectives that describe thy.
Not blaming you, problem is with me,
My choice never agree with thee.
Those pretty dumb asses are big turn down,
Intellectual ones make me look clown.
Knowing myself, and her too, I know this,
Your intelligence, Your flair, you're beyond me miss.
Spoilt for options, I am definitely not,
Yet again will convince myself, am here to rot.

Feelings Must Subside .... FMS

2008-06-03T05:02:00.000-07:00

Going through PagalGuy recently, came across this thread debating a topic which is close to my heart.

Background: two people from FMS had given CAT while in first year, and one of them is now joining IIM C (we will call him Mr. C henceforth) and other IIM B (we will call him Mr. B henceforth). All because of the lack of prudence of Mr. C who declared in open that he, an FMSite, is leaving FMS to join IIM C. It was like a battle won for him and he made sure that everyone hears it. But don’t let this believe you that IIM C is better than FMS. If you really want to know, read his blog (as he’s telling everyone) and god knows what you will find there which will justify his reason for joining IIM C when it is not ‘necessarily’ better than FMS.

So, the stage is all set for a big controversy. Some aspirants for FMS are apprehensive. Some are bluntly accusing FMS of its falling standards. But this is expected from an outsider for whom deciding on a B-school is an important decision of life. What is surprising is the lack of tact and plenty of arrogance shown by the students of FMS (who would now be in 2^nd year and looked up to as mentors by the new batch) in clarifying these aspirants’ doubts.

For the current FMSites, the only reason one or two are leaving FMS (and in the process wasting one precious year of their life time) is not because other institute is better but because each individual has his/her own utility curve (I love economics! :D). They would not concede an inch in accepting than FMS needs to catch up with at least 4 of the IIMs if not all 6 (7 on last count, including Shillong). Instead, they will show enough chivalry to shout with full arrogance at the apprehensive aspirants if they even dare to raise an eyebrow over FMS. It is time they build a small FMS temple in the cramped corridors of the campus.

Consider me no FMS basher. In fact, some of my closest friends are from and in FMS. Neither do I intend to say that FMS is a B-grade b-school. On the contrary, whatever FMS has achieved within the limited funding and being a part of University system is simply superb. No other b-school has achieved that in the country as a part of university system. But that is not all to the story.

The point that I am trying to make is that the students of FMS can handle the queries with more tact, show more prudence and be more gracious and polite in their reply. I greatly appreciate the pride they associate with their institute, which is well deserved. But also remember that by your answers, people are judging your institute as well. And remember, unless you acknowledge that you are the second best and realize where you need to improve, you can never be numero uno. It is time we take concrete steps to make FMS a brand to reckon with and get it back into the same league as better IIMs. And I will do my bit for this too. After all, I loved my one year spent there.

Culture Shock

2008-05-06T22:30:00.000-07:00

This is my 5^th week in Mumbai and now I guess I can make some observations about the city and its culture or rather the lack of it. Surprising as it may seem, the city lacks any culture of its own. There is not distinct culture specific to this city. I am not sure what the likes of Raj Thakeray imply when they say that North Indians are destroying the culture of the city. Delhi has a distinct culture of its own. It is a typical punju (read punjabi) culture in west and north Delhi. Old Delhi has its own culture still preserved while the city decayed for 50 years before it started re-building, courtesy Commonwealth Games.

Even the cosmopolitan Bangalore has a culture of its own. It is called a mixed culture, a pot-pourri. You can feel and sense various cultures co-existing in the city, Tams, mallus, Punjabis (omni-present cumyoontee), gults, biharis etc. The all have their own distinct flavor which can be felt and observed and enjoyed.

Mumbai is a strange city. There is no Marathi culture here, no gujju culture, no parsi culture, and above all no punju culture too!! Or is it that gujjus, parsis and marathis have a culture, but limited to their home. As they step out, so do they leave their culture behind and lose their identity to affiliate to another group, The Professionals. Yes! This is the culture of the city I thought was devoid of any culture. The professionalism, no non-sense attitude of the people here is fascinating, particularly when you are a punju.

Though, I would have loved to see a more deeply embedded culture of the city in its people, more than mere professionalism which anyways all of us need to inculcate, though whether we subscribe to it or not is a different story altogether.

Locally Yours...

2008-04-30T02:24:00.000-07:00

Long overdue had been this post. Not this post but ‘a’ post on this blog, because this post is a manifestation of my recent, and ongoing, tryst with a city called Mumbai. I had come to this city with a lot of pre-conceived notions. I am lying. I never had time to form any notions but just found myself landed in this city one fine morning.

Two month internship program was my calling to this city. The first thing which strikes you about the city, apart from its well-figured and trendily dressed girls, is the respect the city has for the fairer sex. Coming from Delhi, the **** capital of the country, this part of India was a pleasant discovery I must say. Though, one still finds people like me, similarity being limited to geographical roots, leering at women, much less though than what one would find in northern part of the country.

I had the fortune of traveling in the much hyped ‘local’ of Mumbai, fortune because it was a weekend. But take no cues from it, as during a Sunday evening too, the local can be as stuffed as the mouth of a 5 year old trying to chew complete paan at one go. This was when my philosophical self found a similarity between the travel in this local and the life in general, or should it be life in particular? Chuck it.

All that you have to do to get into the local is stand near the gate and you would be pushed in. Similarly, to de-board, just stand anywhere near the gate and you are bound to be pushed out automatically without any self effort! Now if physicists take note of this zero input to finite output process we may have some disruptive technology coming up. Science apart, let me get back to lighter aspects of life I was discussing.

My life so far has been very similar to this. I am sure so would yours be because all of you don’t want to be very different from me, no matter how much you holler: ‘Differentiate or Die’. After all, without a point of parity, point of differentiation does not make much sense. Anyways, you make me digress a lot, if only you could be more focused or for that matter had I been.

I just entered the rat race of the world because all other rats were running the race. Just jumped into the stream of water to flow with it without really thinking if that was the path I wanted to take. All I took was path of least resistance, and the path of least resistance is what everyone takes. Am I talking about MBA I am pursuing? I don’t know, and you too needn’t bother. At this moment, I would like to remind dear reader that I am not at all proposing to stand near the gate of a Mumbai local and try to move in opposite direction. That may be injurious to health.

I hope that I don’t have to board the local of life again where the only way to move is to be (with) the crowd and the only destination is that of the local and not yours. I would rather walk to where I intend to go, just that need a little more push, some courage and preferably a trendily dressed girl along with.

Insights or Opinions? It Depends!

2007-07-30T04:26:00.000-07:00

Slurry of quizzes, late night and parties thrown in between. This is how eventful (?) first month had been at IIMB. I do not agree with people who say classes are boring and torturous. On the contrary, this is what breaks the routine and gets the ball rolling. I won’t be taking any names here but pseudo names are a must, and forgive me if you are not a section B (referred to as Sec B henceforth) guy and hence unable to relate.

Would not bore you with the stuff you already know by restating the facts. In fact, will give some ‘insights’ on the incidents which have rocked (or had potential to rock) the foundations of insanity on which we stand. No doubt we rock!

Events mentioned won’t be in any chronological order, but bear with my whims and fancies. Miss DCP of our sec was asked to give some generic observations about the people of Delhi. Herself being from Delhi, what she said carried (supposed to) a lot of weight. The prize winning answer: Delhiites don’t think before they speak! Hence Proved (Q.E.D.)!

Our very own DML is also a favourite contender for RG god of our sec. He instigates a discussion on bracket and conveniently escapes to ‘mug’ his way to gory. No doubt ‘siyaar’ has taken it on himself to make sure that DML is deplored and decried every time he logs on to bracket. But all this is done in good spirit and hats off to DML!

In case you are wondering too much jargon is floating around, will help you a bit. Bracket is defined as a piece of software with infinite marginal utility having a corner solution on indifference curve and the time between 2 people logging on to bracket defies exponential distribution as everyone is always logged on. To put in simpler words, bracket is a tool of mass communication which may become a weapon of mass destruction given my current grades in quizzes!

Coming to Siyaar, recently academia changed his nomenclature to Sukhdev, is Hoosh Idol of our sec. Whether anything goes right or wrong, him getting hooshed is customary. And this is last time I would be explaining jargon, next time you may stop reading this blog if you wish so. Hoosh is a salutary activity where we raise the (spirits of) honorary member and give him a pat on back (lower part of it).

So much to write about so many people but mid-terms are approaching fast. Let me face one crisis at a time. Once I am done with it, will let you know about more such idiosyncrasies.

Chronicles of a Bored Cabbie

2007-05-14T21:42:00.000-07:00

Following are some random thoughts jotted enroute to Gurgaon daily morning for my summer internship.
------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 12/04/2007

The road to perdition I thought would be a bore,
But the journey too has something for me in store.
Passing by some pretty faces,
Then there are some wearing braces.
As is human nature, always looking outside,
Don’t even know people sitting beside.
Constraint by the cab’s confine,
Have domesticated wild imagination of mine.
Need to be a little forthcoming,
Music of solidarity we would be then humming.
Just hoping that internship at SAP,
Is not my Final Lap.
The shot has just been fired,
For long it will keep me wired.
-------------------------------------------------------------------

Date: 16/04/2007

In the cab this is just another day,
Through busy traffic we are making our way.
Silence has its own benefit,
Somewhere inside a spark it lit.
It is the time to reflect on past,
The week had been anything but fast.
Ambled & stumbled & waited for turn,
Past few days I had been taciturn.
The optimist in me keeps the hope kindled,
My future will be much less brindled.
------------------------------------------------------------------

Date: 17/04/2007

Still interested in reading this boring stuff,
You know not, and all this may be a bluff.
To next chapter let’s move on,
Titled: Professional Life of a Moron.
Now what I would be talking’ll be jargon,
The uninterested may go and watch Eragon.
The day starts with reports of analyst,
Thought of PPO is perhaps the only catalyst.
Next step is making of MTN,
Moving up the ladder, someone tell me ‘When’.
If bestowed would be doing outside-in,
What a pain which I bear and grin.
Will try to make it a little more exciting,
Till the end with boredom I will be fighting.
--------------------------------------------------------------------

Date: 18/04/2007

Writing daily has become customary,
To reach SAP am in no hurry.
Solitude sets the right mood,
Vicissitudes of journey are mind’s food.
Already showing sings of fatigue,
New ideas are what I seek.
I know one day the words will choke,
Will do away with affluence of mind and go broke.
-------------------------------------------------------------------

Date: 19/04/2007

Have never talked about physical evidence,
Would mention some landmarks hence.
Crossing Dhaula Kuan is no more jittery,
Just cruise through flyovers not so glittery.
Yet again we pass by the airport,
Heavily guarded like some arbit fort.
Then comes the 5 star: Radisson is thy name,
If ya can’t recollect, of Kebab Factory fame.
It’s time to cross Delhi-Haryana border,
Full of traffic snarls, chaos and disorder.
Enter Gurgaon: The urban village,
High rising buildings and more such pillage.
Few more not so anxious moments in rush hour,
And when we reach, we bloom like a flower.
--------------------------------------------------------------------

An Ode once again...In a lighter vein!

2007-05-14T21:37:00.000-07:00

Phoenix has risen again, what the heck,
Hung like albatross around the neck!

During induction all ya Hitlers and Mussolini,
Those hard days made us all loony!

Then the parties which were much awaited,
By the end you were all inebriated!

Seminars, Conventions and all that CRAP,
I had to sacrifice my afternoon nap!

Never violated dress code, it was your terror,
When something goes wrong it was attribution error!

To hit me out please don't canter,
With you dear seniors, this was a friendly banter!

An Ode to 2007 Batch...

2007-05-14T21:30:00.000-07:00

It all started with a formal induction,
Short were the days and nights were long,
More than you we knew the sectors and functions,
The hard work has not gone without the gong.

So selfless were all your deeds,
For our summers you put in a lot,
No doubt only the friendship breeds,
For MS phoenix has been in arm a shot.

Then came the moment when ye all shone,
You added another feather in MS' cap,
Splendid placements and apprehensions were gone,
Between myth and reality it further widened the gap.

And now when its time to bid adieu,
We are gonna miss you we have realized,
May you all shine like sun in sky blue,
You were as seniors for us a possession prized.

Not 'Why' but 'Who'!

2007-03-07T06:23:00.000-08:00

All I wanted was to see you smile,
Never were my deeds vile.
My banter may be despicable,
To me not same is applicable.
But then she said what was true,
From my words people construe.
Had she been frank when it all started,
Not so soon would it have departed.
I do not rue your loss,
Just that I wanted to be boss.
Your saying me ‘No’, its sacrilege,
It is but my privilege.

Some Crap.....

2007-01-30T10:39:00.000-08:00

It is all about me, about me that is myself
Really wanted to sound modest, the sound of it
So loud so harsh the very sound of modesty
Coudnt help but blow my own sweet trumpet
The sweet trumpet that it was or was it the sound of her joy
I never had the whiff of her, but the whiff of her was all I had.
It really is all about me, about me that is myself.

And then I landed where I am now, here I am now
Was finding neverland, this neverland is no man’s land
I crib, I cry, I laugh, I enjoy and I enjoy this very thought
The thought that leaves me dry, dry as in the emotions of it
And when I get rid of this thought, this thought that I get rid off
It is the only thing that I have, this thought that I get rid-off
The thought is mine and I am in that thought
It really is all about me, about me that is myself.

I will end it all one day, that fine day will be when you shall pray
Pray of my life, and pray for thereafter of it, the life that is
But I will not think of you anyways, anyways it will be me only
You don’t deserve to be in this, in this little existence of mine
You are meant for bigger things, bigger than the ego of mine
Coz I always want it to be that ways, the ways which are different
Different will be your own prose, don’t think it is for you but for me
It really is all about me, about me that is myself.

Pot-pourri

2007-01-06T09:53:00.000-08:00

Deep inside the earthen pot,
No one knew there was what.
Why should I know what thy hold?
Even if it is a pot full of gold.
Once I tried to peep inside,
All I could hear was deride.
Was asked to trust with blind eye,
But end of my patience was nigh.
Broke the pot and my word,
Sound of emptiness was – Thud!
Now who will hold it for me?
I should have had faith on thee!

Light at the end of the tunnel...

2006-12-04T06:53:00.000-08:00

It struck me like a bolt of lighting,
To control my emotions with myself I was fighting.
Though the writing was on wall for all to see,
The thought of her liking me was a fallacy.
Wanted her to dream my dream for me,
Never really cared about her own fantasy.
But now I don’t want her anymore,
Is it because the grapes are sour?
Behold! I wont give up so soon,
My moods swing with the phases of moon.
Down I might seem one day,
While the sun shines, will make hay.

Selection or Elimination??

2006-12-01T01:14:00.000-08:00

I loved her more than myself. I hated it all the more though. She was a beautiful young woman, whom I had been going out since last 3 months or so. We used to enjoy every single moment that we spent in each other’s company. We were planning to get married soon. But there was a problem. It was her dog. She could not live without her (female dog) and I couldn’t with her. I hate (or may be fear) animals in all form as long as they are alive. That was the only obstacle in our relationship. How I hated that bitch!

The stubborn nature of my girl friend had ascertained my belief that I had to get rid of my fear if the relationship was to proceed. Had been suggested by a friend of mine to walk alone in the wilderness of the dark night in midst of howling sounds and my problem will be solved. I chose to tread on the dark path one fine night….

First thing that woke me next morning was a call from my girl friend. She sounded very hysterical and asked me to come over to her place at once. I rushed there and found her standing on the gate, her eyes red with tears, waiting for me. She hurried me to the backyard of her house. And there what greeted me was the horrifying site.

There lay her dog, throat slit and blood all around. I was sad for my girl friend. But now I was not sure if she would be able to cope up with the grave loss. If only I could get her back. The Bitch!

Inside out....

2006-11-25T00:33:00.000-08:00

In reading your mind I am very interested,
Never in myself, so much time have I invested.
Talking to you always under guise,
That is perhaps my biggest vice.
But you should realize, to you I am true,
What’s hidden from you is hidden from me too.
The difference being the perspective of thy,
You don’t know ‘What’, I don’t know ‘Why’.
I don’t bother myself with too much detail.
After all it is not some holy grail.
In others we should seek our reflection,
And not his/her point of inflection.

Learning from experiences....

2006-11-11T07:36:00.000-08:00

A little apprehension was justifiable. After all, I was giving an exam after a gap of 30 months. And it was not ‘an’ exam but 8 of them. My first semester at FMS has come to an end. Now is the time when professors want to test that how successful they have been in delivering their content. It is said that a professor seeks the reflection of his teachings in his students. I guess that is what the exams are meant for: To check the effectiveness of the content delivery by the professors. And yes, there were some who were trying to burden themselves by thinking that exams are a means to test their abilities. Who says ignorance is bliss?

I was worried that I should not let my professors down. Hence there was an itch to perform well in the exams. Performing well is not a relative term for me. Performing well simply implies to be able to complete the paper within the stipulated time with legible hand writing. The stress was inevitable as my fingers now work faster on keyboard than on paper with pen. I was all set for challenge with the best writing pens, a pencil, a sharpener and an eraser ready. Now came some operational issues like preparing for courses to be able to use the ‘equipments’ I had bought.

For Management Accounting, Managerial Economics and Quantitative Methods I was well prepared. But rest were still an enigma to me. First four papers went relatively well. Then what followed was nothing less than a blood bath. Fifth one Marketing Management had me psyched out. More than half of the chapters were not fortunate enough to be critically analyzed by me. Not my problem though. As per the expectancy theory there were no goals to be achieved and hence the performance was low too.

Mine having a 2 year work experience in IT company does not necessarily translate into myself having a good grasp on my next exam of IT Management. More flustering was the thought that the course covered in classroom contact sessions was not sufficient to make even a 50 marks paper. I went into the examination hall with an ‘open’ mind and my IT work-ex to back me in case of emergency.

Global Seth is what we call our next paper. I still do not know the full name of the course which we studied. The paper was supposed to come from his book. A day before the exam I realized that I did not have his book. His class notes were in too shabby condition because of my lack of concentration (rather distractions that I have) in the class. Then came this sweet ‘little’ friend of mine to my rescue (hint is in the sentence itself). At the 11th hour of the night before the exam I got the summary of three chapters over phone. I made my ‘class notes’ then and there. Next morning, 15 minutes before the exam, got a ‘great summary’ of the course by another intelligent, diligent and hard working friend of mine (hint: from IIT). The paper went smoothly. Special thanks to the two angels sent by god to bail the professor out (remember, exams are a test of professor’s teaching capabilities).

Final paper on interpersonal skills was prepared for with due diligence and prudence by me. I was on Orkut whole of the day before the exam, honing my interpersonal skills! But alas, nothing of that sort came in exam. Again came to my rescue the ‘great summary’ provided by the same friend 15 minutes before the start of the exam. But let me assure you that 30 minutes before the start of the exam are the most taxing moments when people are discussing their exploits. You are like Alice in wonderland, all lost!

But the trouble has been worth it. I have learnt my lessons. Next semester end I will be more prudent in my preparation. I now know that the exams can be passed by taking class notes one night before exam and the ‘great summary’ some moments before. Next semester I am not going to waste any money on books or time on class notes. I do hope that my sweet ‘little’ friend and the genius friend from IIT do not read this blog. Or else they mail feel that I am taking advantage of them. They would be better off thinking that ‘A friend in need is a friend in deed!’

Exam Time!!

2006-10-30T06:54:00.000-08:00

Wid cloak of darkness comes d mighty night,
Am worried bout getting my balance sheet right.
By studying so little I have set a precedence,
0% is my hypothesis' level of confidence.
They call it fundamental attribution error,
I call it IT and Marketing's terror.
I do hope my fundas will be clear after this examination thing,
Only after falling of dusk, owl of minerva spreads its wings!

Warmth of winters....

2006-10-24T00:08:00.000-07:00

This winter has made me cold,
All my feelings are left to freeze.
If only I could tell her my state,
Snow would have been melted by the warm breeze.

To not to talk to her were reasons galore,
But much stronger was that single cause,
In dilemma I chose the easy path,
Her gain was my utter loss.

Should concentrate on for what I am here,
My reasons for happiness: Distraction is thy name.
I hope to achieve what I truly deserve,
Mentioned above are all excuses lame.

SAPped

2006-10-14T22:08:00.000-07:00

Following are the gory details of my SAP interview round 2. I am not going to mention anything about round 1 as I am myself not sure why I cleared round 1 and hence don’t want any speculations from you too!

Scene: Three panel members. One sitting to my right (P1), one to my left (P2)and one in front (P3).

P3: How was the first interview?Me: (Must have been good that’s why I am here for the second) It was good sir.
P3: Tell us something where we could have improved upon in our first interview.
Me: (Am I taking our giving interview) blah-blah
P3: Learning from your job.
Me: Cracked a joke here but it seemed to fell on deaf years. I was the only one laughing after my attempted joke!
P2: What are some of the keywords that you remember from our PPT that we had sent?
Me: (Stopped myself somehow from mentioning the stipend) blah-blah.
P2: Are you strong in analytical skills and finance?
Me: ( Put up a brave face) Yes for analytical skills and no for finance as of now.
P2: How will you make a demand forecast of contact lenses? Use your creative thinking and you are not going t undertake any survey of sample population etc?
Me: (WTF??)…..GAS…….
Finally P1 realized that he was missing the action and with all vigor he too jumped into the battlefield where I was at receiving end.
P1: What are your long term goals?
Me: Blah-blah.
P1: (Bemused) Are you sure? Anyways, I don’t see your prior work-ex helping you in any way towards achieving your goal….
Me: (Tried to defend myself, but could not have told him the truth that beggars can’t be choosers. That was the only job I had and even my just mentioned long term goal exists only on paper :D)
P1: I see that you are trying to do a lot many things simultaneously without mastering even one of them….
Me: (That’s what we have been taught here during the course of our MBA) But as courtesy demands, I tried defending myself.
P3: Which other companies are you aiming at for your summers?
Me: (Tried recollecting the companies which offered good packages :D. But then there was no point talking about my fantasies. I wanted to be their fantasy! )

??

2006-09-27T01:36:00.000-07:00

Importance of victory is realized by those who lose,
It was a path i had not option but to choose.
It was not for your sake neither by default it was.
But even I will never know its real cause.
Such are the ways of life where reasons dont exist,
Passions guide me thru dark night nd morning's mist.
For other's fancies I can't pretend,
What I give is not what others lend.
I delink the outcome from my actions,
This removes from my mind all the factions.
I am sure it makes sense to me,
To u if it dusnt then I am free.

Inspired to inspire....

2006-08-21T10:02:00.000-07:00

As a part of its continuous endeavour to provide the students the opportunity to interact with the leaders in industry, FMS invited Dr Ganesh Natarajan and Ms Manjari Gokhale for a guest lecture on Inspirational Leadership. The guest lecture was organized at FMS South Campus by MBA (MS) students. Dr Ganesh Natarajan, Deputy Chairman and managing Director of Zensar Technologies Limited needs no introduction. Ms Manjari Gokhale heads Human resource function at Zensar.

Dr Ganesh contrary to expectation did not come with any power point presentation which has become synonymous with IT. A great speaker that he is, he kept the audience captive as he spoke about the various facets of Inspirational Leadership. The interactive session covered on how India went on to become the IT superpower and who were the leaders who foresee this IT revolution much ahead of its time. The insight provided by Dr Ganesh, being a part of IT industry from 1988 when it was still in infancy in India, was quite valuable.

Ms Manjari took on from here and went on to explain 10 qualities which are desired in an individual to be and remain inspired. Ms Manjari has done considerable research on the topic, as a part of co-authoring the book titled 'Inspired' with Dr Ganesh. We were also given a brief preview of the book which has case studies of 23 individuals from different realms of life.

Dr Ganesh laced with his characteristic humour and the no non sense style of Ms Manjari was appreciated delivered the talk effectively. We do hope that this talk has inspired us enough to be the future leaders in the organizations of tomorrow.

- An Inspired FMSite

Devil and the deep sea

2006-08-17T10:36:00.000-07:00

Since I got up from my deep slumber today morning, I have been having a very good feeling. I could almost feel the start to a great day ahead. But let me tell you that this is how my each day begins! I had a busy day ahead of me with classes from 9 AM to 2.30 PM and then two guest lectures till 6.00PM. Today I had a greater visibility in the class. This was not because I was more vocal today, but around 20 people from my batch had gone for some marketing summit @ Hotel Taj. So, as prof Mitra had promised, the remaining 23 of us had a 'jolly good time' in his session.

Prof Mitra made us do a group activity called fish bowl. I won't go into the details of the activity intentionally to make you more curious to know more about it. But one thing is assured, all 23 of us enjoyed it a lot. This activity helped in a lot of ice breaking. A lot of 'feelings' were poured out with a lot of thinking going into the formulation of these feelings! I do hope that people will take the points out of this activity in a positive manner instead of taking it as a personal attack. All in all a good TP! :D

Next comes the ppt by the librarian of DU. This I must say again was very fruitful. We as students are not utilizing even 1% of all the facilities provided to us by DULS (again I won't take pains to explain this term). I am definitely a more informed person after this session and from now on will have to find some other reason to attribute my failure to not to complete assignments on time instead of saying that library was closed or not accessible. It was a pleasant surprise to know that DULS has made great inroads in terms of harnessing the power of IT and is something to boast about. Did I mention that I felt asleep in the middle of the ppt and was told all the stuff mentioned above by some reliable resources.

Finally the icing on the cake. This was the Guest Lecture by Prof Loomba from some US varsity. Now the topic of the lecture: Infrastructure Supply Chain : How India compares with China. This was a very enriching talk delivered by Prof Loomba. It certainly explained things from a completely new perspective. This new perspective simply talked about inherent strengths and weaknesses of India vis-a-vis China and how they compare with US and Japanese model without touching either on supply chain or infrastructure for that matter. And still he managed to get our applause when he finished on time!

Experiences maketh the wise man. Next time I know what to do when half the class has gone to some obscure summit and the rest half is supposed to attend a compulsory GL: Buy out the freedom @ Rs100! I forgot to mention the most satisfying aspect of the hectic day. At the end of the day I saw Shereen Bhan on CNBC TV18, which my fellow batchmates at mktg summit could not catch a glimpse of even after paying Rs 1500 (though the money was not paid for that).

Off to sleep zzzzzzzzz.......

Beautiful Life....

2006-08-08T10:06:00.000-07:00

I feel with every breath I take, I am dying,
To my own self many a times I am lying.
Why do I exist even I dont know,
Sometimes these thoughts really make me low.
But to take solace I don't find someone else to pity on,
Whatever I am, but not a sadist moron.
One day these inner turbulations will abate,
Before that I want to write my own fate.
But then I feel helpless to even decide my own path,
Am intimadated by circumstances' wrath.
What do I do in those moments of despair,
Life is not always so fair.
Do I sit on the shore to enjoy the beautiful sea,
Or shall I swim with the tides to where it takes me.

***** Unable to end it rite now.... will continue with it some other time*****

Salesman

2006-08-03T09:27:00.000-07:00

****This is an old article which I wrote some 2 years back but due to current lack of creative stimulus in me I hav no other option but to reproduce this masterpeice from me! :D ****

Here I am, standing in the sparkling new SONY showroom which has recently opened near my house. I had a plan since sometime to buy a 2000W music system. I am interested in just a reliable deck, not too loud which plays VCDs too. No, i don't want it to play MP3 because I am strictly against music piracy and I have yet to come across an original MP3 CD. The showroom provided me with a wide choice, from a simple 100W PMPO output stereo to 10,000W home theatre system. But I know what is my need and more importantly my budget.

Just as I was wondering where would I find my product I was greeted by a warm 'Good Morning'. Standing by my side was a crisply dressed young man. He was one of those charming salesman which you find a plenty, from these showrooms to streets, selling everything from soaps to cars. After half an hour of brainwashing session with this salesman, I was in possession of 'it'. The deck offered me much more than I wanted. It was 3300W, 3-VCD player and did not come at no extra cost. I had to shell out one and a half times my pre-planned budget. And I thought only government had a budget deficit. Yes, it played MP3 too!

Walking back to the parking lot, followed by a person carrying my deck, both of us were sweating profusely. He because of the weight of the deck and I because of its price or was it the weather? Thankfully you don't have to carry the product yourself to your car after spending a fortune on it. After placing it on back seat and assuring myself that it was safe there, I set out back to home. While concentrating on driving I kept wondering on where would I keep the deck. In my room or in the common living room?

Knock! Knock! It broke my thoughts. A man, knuckling the window of my car, on an intersection. It was a long red light. He was a salesman too, selling tissue papers for car. The shabby clothes he was wearing it seemed hadn't been washed since months, very much like him. He offered to sell me 2 packs for Rs 40. I remember last time buying one for Rs 40. That was a good deal, but how can I purchase anything from a shabbily dressed salesman selling on road, hawker to be precise. By the time light turned green he was offering them at 4 for Rs 40. He was almost pleading and I was tempted too by the bargain. But still he was not the kind of person I would buy something from.

As I started moving again so did my thought process. But I was not thinking of the music system anymore. My mind was occupied by the thought of the incident that just took place. Why had I not bought the tissue paper eventhough I was needing it for my car and more importantly it was offered at a throw away price. The salesman in the showroom convinced me that I would enjoy listening to 3300W music system more than 2000W system, eventhough I would rarely ever be playing it at full volume. Still I was convinced to shell out more than it deserved. I was also convinced to have an extra feature of MP3 playback not withstanding the fact that i would never be using it. Value addition in true sense!

What precisely was the difference between the two salesmen? May be one was selling inside an airconditioned showroom but then the other was selling under a much wider roof. Maybe it was the difference in their physical appearance, but the they were not the product themselves whose appearance should have mattered. Maybe it was the product itself, a deck on one hand and tissue paper on another. But the music system i bought was not what i needed and the tissue paper i didn't buy was what i needed even more at that price. Finally I convinced myself it was the government. The government had passed a bill recently which made it illegal to buy and sell goods from a hawker at traffic intersections. Yes, it was a satisfactory explanation. So, I had done nothing wrong in letting go a good deal and devoiding a poor person from earning a livelihood for himself. Afterall I am a law abiding citizen.

Halt! In Delhi one cannot drive for 5 minutes at a stretch without getting to next intersection. Another red light. Another knock on my car window. But not another hawker. A beggar this time. Suddenly I realized many common things between the beggar and the hawker. Both were shabbily dressed, both targeting their customers at intersections, both making their customers feel as if they are giving maximum value for money. The beggar started by saying that may you have a good job. Seeing me unmoved I was blessed with a beautiful wife too! It ascertained one thing, that the customer is king.

By now I was sure of one thing that there is definitely a relationship between the light going green and my mind ticking. This time it was the beggar who engrossed my thoughts. The beggar too was a salesman. The difference was the product. He was selling blessings and his story of poverty and grief. His story that he hadn't had anything to eat since last two days failed to move me. Was it because I thought he was lying or was it because I thought he was not earning the right way. I am a very principled man and do not support or encourage begging. He should do some work, something honorable. Had the beggar been doing something more respectable I would have definitely helped him. Why is he begging? He should do something. May be he can start by selling tissue papers at traffic intersection.

Getting Jiggy with it!

2006-08-03T09:17:00.000-07:00

As usual I was not speaking much. We are currently having some free time and 5 of us are having conversation on some not-so-interesting-for-me topic. We are three boys and two girls and the girls being initiator of blabber were setting the tone of the conversation. Girls generally talk bout either their new sandals or other person's boy/girl friend. I can understand the curiosity about knowing someone else's BF/GF, but really not interested in a girl's sandal this way or otherwise.

This time I was the target and was asked the inevitable question about my GF. Here I committed what I consider to be my one of the biggest mistake till date. What I did will do the Moron Society of India proud (am not its member yet). I said I have one GF (even though I don't) and then came icing on the cake. I told that she was with me since 4th class! Why I said this? Well, ostensible answer is that I just wanted to blurt something and in an attempt to think on the feet I was left with nothing but cold feet. Anyways, the real reason is that I am contesting for the presidentship of Moron Society of India (this should be considered a passing phase of insanity and not to be believed).

I did not anticipate the repercussions of this until I regained from being inane. This is the fool proof way of telling girls that please stay away from me and not one of you is obliged to see me with 'those' intentions. I tried hard but could not kick my ass for the feat I managed to achieve within 3 weeks of my joining FMS. I am not such a joker as I may appear to some of you. I did regain some senses the moment I said this and 'tried' some damage control exercise. I boldly said that I am bored with her and looking for other avenues. Guys will agree that there's nothing wrong with that but when the stars are not in right position just nothing can go right for you. One of the girl pounced upon me saying that I was being mean. The way she talked on behalf of all women/girls (both are same according to me) and attacked me, it seemed as if I was a convicted rapist. This is when I had this self realization that why sandal and GF/BF are talked in same breath. Because you are not supposed to be bored of either, even when you get yourself a new one!

Now the damage has been multiplied (as I am sure that from these 2 girls it will reach to 20 other people). To summarize, I have a GF and hence not 'available' for outside support. Secondly, I am a demon who is bored with his (non existent) GF as if she is just another one of my deals. But, as some great man said (or did he) that failure is not failing once but to not to try again. You can bet that I won't ever try again telling a girl that I have a GF but will certainly try to get the situation under control. How that will be done is yet to be formulated. I am once again craving for that coveted tag: Eligible Bachelor!

Random Musings...

2006-07-31T09:36:00.000-07:00

Some day it will come to an end, like all things good.
But only then will my journey start in the dark wood!
I do hope am prepared for it at the end.
To the unknown land when I am send!
Want to make the best out of it today.
Want to come out best when i make foray!
Need all the best things to happen to me.
But will that make me happy, i can not foresee!
I guess it is time to stop thinking so obscure.
Carry on with life and of urself be sure!

Delhi: Students' nightmare.

2006-04-22T02:16:00.000-07:00

The model code of conduct in effect because of impending Assembly elections in India has led to a momentary hiatus in pursuing the OBC quota in Central Universities. While a lot of debate is going on about the ill-effects it will have on the student quality at IITs and IIMs, let us take a moment to think beyond IITs and IIMs.

Though there is no gainsaying the fact that IITs and IIMs have bought India a global recognition which only IT/ITES can said to have equaled. But, I personally feel that a far greater casualty of this quota system will be the universities like 'Delhi University'. Delhi university is also a central university and unlike the universities of Bombay, Chennai or Kolkatta which are either state universities or have reservation for students domiciled in that state.

Delhi University or DU is the only lifeline for the students of Delhi. There is already a great mismatch between the number of seats and applications for admission in DU. Students of Delhi do not enjoy the privileges enjoyed by their counterparts in Mumbai, Chennai or Kolkatta. They have to compete with students from all over India to secure a seat in a college of their choice. I am appalled to think of the situation of students in Delhi seeking admission in college when a further 27% seats will be reserved for OBC category.

Of the 9,000-odd SC/ST seats at stake in Delhi University, about 20% (nearly 2,000 seats) remain vacant every year. Add to that about 1,000 of the 1,300 seats reserved for physically challenged that are never occupied, and nearly 3,000 students lose out on a chance to be part of the university.
(Source: Times of India: http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/articleshow/1485488.cms)

With further reservations, the only way forward is more vacant seats, and more deserving candidates either joining some second rung university which might not do justice to their abilities or simply dropping out.

After all, you are not increasing the number of seats but only the probability of admission for one class of society at the cost of another. I hope our politician do amend the constitution some 50 years down the line to include more castes under OBC. That is because by that time many people from 'General' category would be forced to become Backward because of whims and fancies of the 'chosen' few.

Metaphorically speaking

2006-04-17T00:16:00.000-07:00

For the uninitiated, I got admit to FMS and a good friend of mine to IIM C. While congratulating him, I told him that how I envy him right now. He replied that FMS is as good as any other B-school in India. This is what I told him:

Getting a call from FMS is like learning the art of love making through a correspondence course. It is satisfying.
Getting a call from IIM is like being molested by a bunch of Miss Universe contestants, backstage. Dream come true!!

ciaoo

Sneak preview

2006-04-10T05:08:00.000-07:00

Thought of giving lesser mortals a divine glimpse of the eternal truth......Ahem!

Murphy: A Management Guru ??

2006-03-31T02:21:00.000-08:00

Ever correlated Murphy with management?? neither did I until recently.................

Anything which can go wrong will go wrong. A plain and simple statement, which used to be part of so many e-mail forwards was nothing more than a part of spam for me. I was preparing for CAT and had joined test series by CL and IMS. In all the Mock CATs and SIMCATs, I scored above 99 percentile.

This boosted my confidence greatly in build up to D-day. On the day when it mattered most, I gave it my best shot. The percentile that I got was sufficient to get me admission to any IIM! And I mean it. But then the all knowing, omnipresent Murphy's law got better of me. I did not get a call from any IIM as my scored was skewed.

I was not mentally prepared to go to any B-school other than IIM. And also I was not ready to wait another year. It caused me great pain and anguish to take admission somewhere else.....

As Jack Welch has said, always be prepared for the worst. Do sincerely believe that anything which can go wrong will go wrong. Prepare yourself for the worst before starting for anything. And you will never be disappointed, may anything come........

Analogy...

2006-02-21T00:23:00.000-08:00

This book reminded me of my college days. Those were the golden days which I realize played a vital role in uplifting and enriching my life. As any budding engineer will agree with a veteran (that is me), the only time we study is 1 day before exam.

Our mind is focussed for next 24 hours. The only thought in our minds is to pass with respectable marks! So much focus for 24 hours (yes, in dreams too while sleeping we are focussed) at a stretch has invariably bore its fruit for me.

The next three hours, that is the duration of the exam, the mind is only in one state: Blank! This 24 hour cycle repeated every quarter for 4 years for all the subjects.

The book I am currently reading suggests that this quarterly repeating 24 hour cycle is the path towards internal bliss. I am reading a book which teaches us the art of medidation. It says that during meditation our mind should be blank. For beginners, they should first try to concentrate on a single thought only. And then as a next step try to have a blank mind with no thought process whatsoever.

Only if I had read this book before, I would have been a happier soul after my exams! :)

m Luvin it !-

2006-02-07T20:28:00.000-08:00

Perseverance is a strength I possess in abundance. This is how Meriam Webster defines perseverance: to persist in a state, enterprise, or undertaking in spite of counterinfluences, opposition, or discouragement.

Me has given CAT thrice........technically 4 times (that includes cancelled CAT) ! I never thought even once that I failed to clear it. But always took pride in my quality of perseverance and started preparing again. That was until yesterday.

Yesterday I got a mail from a coaching institute that they are considering me as a faculty in their institute ! I was ecstatic, that the coaching institute has realized my true worth! But my ecstacy was short lived, courtsey a dear friend of mine.

This friend of mine is a thorough gentleman. He can never let anyone remain under false impression. He cleared any misgivings that I had on account of coaching institute's offer. He told me that it was a subtle way of telling me that I better stop preparing for CAT, as it was not my domain and concentrate on other things where I need not fail again and again.

"Yesterday upon the stair/ I met a man who wasn't there./ He wasn't there again today/ I wish that man would go away."

Complex relations....

2006-02-07T01:40:00.000-08:00

The intelligentia going through this blog must be wondering the link between my blog www.ergocogitosum.blogspot.com and my identity which is identity_crisis! :)

Well, the things are rarely so complex as they appear. ergo cogito sum - I Think Therefore I Am. And here I am having Identity Crisis (Just to clear some confusion, Identity_crisis was my profile name till I became double-faced)! But are these two related. Of course, yes!

Having an identity crisis implies I have an identity (think about this profound statement :)). That means I can Think. This is not a case of a theorem being true and hence is inverse is also true. Just because "I am" does not mean I can think. But since I am aware that I have an identity (misplaced identity in my case), I conclude that I think and therefore I am.

Whoa! This is the first mathematical proof given by me for a philosophical statement. Descartes is surely casting his shadow on me ! (That was nothing but self patting).

I think, I am.......Aha, that's an interesting line. More about it later.

Just Born

2006-02-07T01:32:00.000-08:00

Why do people write blog? This question had intrigued me for long. That is until I realized the power of blog. A blog to me is a punch bag, helps in not only venting out my ire but develop some skills too (writing skills I am referring to).
So considering the immense empowerment this blog seems to provide, here I am with my own little baby. This just born blog will take some time to mature. Till then enjoy its childlike innocence.
Will be back soon.
~?